Page number 12
WELLBEING RRR s R e R x EV l U i P fe YOUR Is your relationship running low on vitamin P (passion)? Don’t worry, it can happen to anyone, and it’s easier to rekindle your desire than you think. BY ROBYN MACLARTY I f it hasn’t happened yet, it will. Sooner or later, every long-term relationship goes through periods of waxing and waning desire. Completely natural and at times appropriate – during early parenthood, for example, or times of stress or loss – this is when our erotic selves take a backseat to other priorities. While it’s very normal, it’s important not to be complacent, as we are creatures of habit, and when we stop seeing our partner (and ourselves) as sexual beings, it can be all too easy to slip into a pattern of neglecting this essential dimension of intimacy, leading to feelings of loss, rejection, yearning and disconnection. So, does your relationship need a little tune-up? Do you need to reconnect with your, and your partner’s inner lover?
Page number 13
WELLBEING DEMONSTRATE YOUR DESIRE Perhaps the simplest and most effective advice for kick- starting the chemistry in your relationship is to behave the way you did when you first fell in love and couldn’t keep your hands off each other. What kinds of things did you say? What was your body language like? How did you look at them? Life coach Tony Robbins says: “When you were first together, you always gave it your all because your partner’s love woke you up to the gift of life. You worked hard to come up with creative ideas for dates and conversations, and you strove to show the very best of you no matter the circumstances.” Perhaps it’s time to revisit that place? GO BACK TO BASICS “Expecting sex to be instantly passionate again is a bit of a long stretch but you must start somewhere,” says intimacy coach Tracy Jacobs. “Have an open conversation about the pace at which you both feel comfortable going. Begin with holding hands, cuddling, ‘safe’ or consensual touching, and move to slow kissing, gradually leading up to deeper, open- mouth kissing, and be open to what happens from there.” Even if all you do is enjoy a kiss, this will add to the overall “pleasure quotient” of your connection – and that can only be a good thing.
